Some Random Thoughts...

This may be a Derek-like post. Just a few thoughts and no pictures. =)  I'm enjoying a quiet morning today. I fought the pressure I put on myself to get the kids out to do something and decided we would spend the day at home. The girls are both tired (perhaps still adjusting back to our time zone along with daylight savings). Karis also may be getting sick -- all three kids were sick-free for about a week but sadly that short, long-awaited streak may be coming to an end. 

I've been spending the morning organizing and finding places for things that have yet to find their spot since they were unpacked months ago. I'm still trying to make our home the way I would like it to be. I'm still looking for things that are packed away somewhere, but at the same time slowly losing hope that they'll be found until we move and unpack again.  

It's been about a week since we returned from California. Our clothes are clean and put away. The refrigerator and freezer have been re-stocked. Karis returned to preschool and we enjoyed going to our church last Sunday. All that to say, life has resumed for us here in Texas. 

We've been here now for about 3 1/2 months. Each week I meet more and more people at church to where I now feel like I recognize a good number of people on Sundays. Derek and I are a part of a small group where, for the first time in over four years, we are not hosting at our home. We bring our kids and help pay for teenage babysitters at the house. I joined a women's small group in the morning where I have met some great ladies. I'm looking forward to meeting more people and getting to know a few people better. I'm so ready for the weather to warm up so we can spend more time outside and be done with this cold season. 

Needless to say, Derek is enjoying life back to normal with us all together at home. He's been busy at work preparing for all the Easter festivities our church has planned. It's a great time of year as we celebrate our risen Lord! 

This week, Kyle turns 10 months old and Makena turns 3! There will definitely be a couple more posts later this week.

Embracing This Season

I resigned from work back in November and my last day of work was technically February 4.  I am still needed to finish up a large project at work, so I am working as a contractor one day a work for now, and on an as-needed basis in the future.  I no longer have health benefits with the company, but my hourly rate has increased.

This has become a transition period for me from working 20 hours a week to becoming a full-time mom.   Life has slowed down for me in a good way.  I am such a busy-body and a task-oriented person.  I am always picking up, tidying up and finding things to do around the house all day long (though I feel like my efforts are futile because the house is still a mess!).  I love when my calendar is full.  I thrive on crossing things off my To Do lists.  But lately, I have been more relaxed and have spent more focused time with the girls. 

I am challenging myself with keeping a long-term focus on raising our two girls.  I don’t want to get caught up in just meeting their daily physical needs.  For me that is so easy to do --  my whole day can be filled with doing laundry, cooking and cleaning.  But, I want to seize learning opportunities and model a life of godly character, especially now that Karis is getting older and can understand and perceive so much.  I have to admit that I fail miserably at times in trying to accomplish these things.  When I get into a “busy” mode, I turn to the TV to babysit for me.  In the late afternoon or evenings, I sometimes feel a blanket of tiredness come over me.  I can be so short with Karis and grace is nowhere to be found.  I ask for forgiveness from Karis and God, and hope that in my weakness there is still something positive for Karis to learn.   

Serving and being involved at church has always been a part of my life.  Since Karis was born, I have not been able to do much, if anything at all.  I miss it.  I understand that in this season of my life, my kids are my ministry, but I have been struggling the past few months with wanting to do more outside the home.  It wasn’t until last week when I heard a mom of teenagers talk about when her children were very young.  She was so involved in ministry that she felt like the church nursery was raising her kids.  She pulled back and spent more time at home and now she is reaping  the benefits.   She has a close relationship with them and they “rise up and call her blessed.”  (Proverbs 31:28)  It wasn’t until I heard that, that I was really able to release my desires to do more.   I’ve been finding my own ways to serve the church body.  It’s not showing up at church to do set-up or going to planning meetings, but rather watching people’s kids or baking something sweet for someone to enjoy.  It’s my way of ministering to others.  Serving has taken on a different look for me, but it is what fits in my season of life… and I accept that. 

I’m excited for this new chapter.  I know there’s a lot more for me to learn and experience.  My kids are growing up fast and I’m enjoying all the ups and downs of motherhood.  It’s been a great ride!

Here are some random, "real" pics of the girls in action.  The first one was taken a few months ago when Makena realized she was just tall enough to grab food off Karis' tray.  She is always looking for food!

Karis hates when Makena puts a toy in her mouth and makes it "yucky."

When we hear Daddy come home, I try to take one of the girls out to greet him.  On one of the days when Makena went out, she got to check out Dad's bike.  I think she thought she was really going to go for a ride ...  check out her toes!

cravings

I'm craving Korean food... again. It's not a pregnancy thing. It's a Korean person thing. Sadly, there are no good Korean restaurants near where we live, or bad ones for that matter. To plan, to drive, to take the baby... all of that leaves me going for weeks without Korean food.

I wish there were trucks that would drive around and sell Korean food. I see them all the time with Mexican food. Why haven't the Koreans picked up on this??