Our Small Group

Derek and I are in a great small group. This group has evolved over the last couple years. The group started when we lived in Costa Mesa. It was us and the Baylors meeting every other Saturday morning. We loved starting the weekend with breakfast and good friends. While in this group, I joined a women’s group on the church campus. I met the Maruskas who recently got married and were looking for a group. They joined our group and our group moved to Irvine since the Baylors were still in Costa Mesa and we had moved to RSM. We started to meet weekly. The Galarzas were then looking for a group, so they joined us and the group then moved to our place in RSM.

The group was great when it was just two couples, but I love where it is now. I’ve been enjoying getting to know everyone on a deeper level as we share our lives, laughs and food. Not only are all of us “newlyweds,” but three out of the four couples will have their first newborn by the end of this month.

Here are a couple photos taken two weeks ago on a small group night.  We ate dinner and hung out.  We were supposed to have a group bonding time with games, but the Nintendo system was brought and we lost the guys... 

Right now we’re studying Sacred Marriage. It comes at a great time for me as things have changed since we had Karis. The study is helping me to put more focus on our marriage in the midst of the craziness. For me, I learned that it takes 7-10 years for a couple to really become and feel like one unit (that long?!).  In my mind, I thought the newlywed stage was supposed to be the best time in a marriage.  As we enter into our third year of marriage, with a child, things definitely aren't the way they were when we were newlyweds.  Instead of fretting over it and wishing things were the way they were, I now know that this different season, and the new challenges that we face, will deepen our relationship.  We've had a great first 2+ years of marriage with few trials, friction or stress.  But as the years go by and we experience a whole lot more together, we will definitely be stronger as a couple.  I am looking forward to it!

I also learned that studies show that during the child rearing stage, the majority of married couples say their levels of satisfaction with their marriage decline.  That's not to say I'm going to go with the status quo, but it does help me to set realistic expectations.  I can't expect things to be the same nor can I expect to experience wedding bliss at every turn.  Things are definitely different with Karis, so we're adjusting to one another and learning to extend more grace.  We are enjoying our new roles as parents.  I pray that we'll continue to focus on our marriage when it's so easy to just focus on Karis.  I'm thankful that our small group will help us along the way!