The Truth Is Out

I'm not sure how he does it, but Derek is a stern disciplinarian but also the biggest softy to his little girls. They simply love and adore him, and I know they'll one day appreciate his loving discipline.  I watch his relationship with them and it assures me that they'll grow up to be amazing women with such a positive and loving male figure in their lives.

To Karis, As You Turn 18 Months

Karis,

Today you turned 18 months old! There are days when I look at you and still think, "Wow, this child is mine." I am so blessed and thankful. When you were born, I never could have imagined how much joy you would bring into our lives.

You are such a happy baby with a great personality. You make me laugh and smile throughout each day. I have been praying since before you were born that you would love people deeply. I can see God molding your heart in such a way. You love meeting new people and interacting with them. Many of our friends tell us how you make them happy and they always look forward to seeing you. I know you will continue to bless those around you for the rest of your life. I pray that your life would usher many into the Kingdom.

You are our little monkey. You love to climb on tables, chairs, the couch and even your toys. It frustrates mommy and daddy to no end because we're afraid you're going to hurt yourself. Unfortunately, you don't have the same fear. When you do fall (it's not often b/c you have a pretty good balance and coordination) you don't cry for long, if at all. You would rather take the reprimand/discipline and a bump on the head over giving up your love to climb. We will be finding a gymnastics class for you SOON!

I love how you're always running from point A to point B (you hardly ever just walk around the house).

I love when you're trying to be silly to get us to laugh. I love the sound of your laughter and when you laugh at nothing at all (or so it seems). I love the ways you try to communicate with us with hand motions and sounds. You’re quite hesitant to try to say new words. It seems as if you want to make sure you say it right or not at all. Your favorite words are, “ma,” “da,” “ball,” “nigh-nigh” and “duck.”

I have loved seeing your relationship with daddy develop. Seeing him be such a good daddy to you has made me love him even more. He gets so excited to see you when he gets home from work, as do you. You now recognize the sound of his motorcycle coming down the street. I love hearing the two of you laugh together and read books. I love how you're so content being held in his arms. I have even heard daddy say, "Look at the princess, she's so pretty." Only his little girl could get him to say that! He loves having you with him to show you off. He is a proud daddy who loves you so much.

You love to kiss and hold your little sister. You still get frustrated when Makena takes up so much of my time. You show me where I can put her down so that I can be freed up to play with you!

You love to be outside and to go places. I love the way you grab your shoes on the way to the door.

Dogs continue to delight you. Fluffy is still your best friend.

Food is not much interest to you and you'd rather play than sit in the high chair. We continue to struggle to get you to eat enough during the day. I now bribe you with fruit to finish your dinner (usually brown rice, chicken and veggies). Or, I play make believe with a rubber duck or let you play with a soda can. Fruit is about the only thing you'll never turn down. You're finally getting your molars now so we hope you'll be able to broaden your food choices and get more excited about eating. I continue to try to give you only healthy food and am thankful that you still love your veggies and haven't eaten a lot of processed foods.

You still stick everything in your mouth. You love to brush your teeth and to have your hair blow-dried. You still put up a fight every time I try to trim your nails.

You throw tantrums, as do most kids your age, when you don't get your way. I'm hoping that you soon understand that when you fall to the ground and whine or run to the front door and cry, that it's not going to get you what you want. Then we can be done with them and move on. =)

It’s been so much fun watching you grow up and learning new things. You’re one smart cookie! I’m excited for you to become a little girl. Karis, I mean it with all my heart when I tell you each night when you go to bed that mommy loves you.

Is it just coincidence?

Is it just a coincidence that whenever I finally get to posting on our blog, my wonderful wife blogs the very next day? I don't know... but let's see if she posts tomorrow. Maybe she's just trying to catch the wave of my one follower. =P

That isn't the real reason for today's blog. I wanted to stop and reflect for a moment. Awhile back, I wrote about the first week of Life's Healing Choices. Well, it's still very powerful. You can listen to the weekend messages HERE and choosing the "Life's Healing Choices - The Beatitudes." And consider picking up the book by John Baker upon which it's based to complement the sermons. If you're not ready to examine what's not going right in your life, then don't bother. But if you are ready, wow!

I am still not 100% clear about my hurts, habits, and hangups, but things sure have become much clearer. I've been doing pretty well in life emotionally despite experiencing quite a bit (a lot at a young age, too). But I have definitely incorporated some coping tactics to avoid pain.

A little about me... I'm a catastrophizer. I have a great imagination and see much potential for awful things to happen. For example, watching my daughter taking a few steps and being concerned that she stumble into the exact corner of the chest and damage her eye. Or, one of Lena's favorites, seeing a Tupperware container without a secure seal. Heaven forbid that some air might enter in and cause something to spoil. I'm certain that much of this characteristic stems from losing my father in a car accident a block from our home two days before Christmas when I was six years old. I know the terrible feeling of devastation from a very young age. I guess you could say that feeling has stayed fresh with me all these years. I try to control many things in my life and those around me so that it appears I am preventing pain.

I also have a great desire to see justice done. Just ride with me on a California freeway some day. My blood boils quickly for drivers performing illegal or even just stupid maneuvers on the freeways. How quickly I can gloss over my own driving indiscretions! I think this stems from my youth also. How unfair it is for a child to lose a parent at such a young age. I'm pretty sure that is somehow at the root of my anger at things being done that I perceive as unfair (particularly when they are directly pointed at me).

I don't have solutions yet... but I'm glad that God has been revealing to me areas where I have hurts, habits, and hang ups that are not healthy. I'll keep you posted on my journey towards health. It may be awhile as it's taken me nearly 40 years to acquire them all. I cannot expect to fix them overnight.

On less serious notes, I'm excited for my day with Karis today. We're going to hang out at an animal shelter today. But only looking at the dogs. =) She loves animals.

And, Lena and I are moving to Irvine October 31. I'll send an email with our new address and phone privately through email. If you want to help load or unload, mark your calendar now. And since this is one paragraph after so many up above, I'll likely post again all by itself.

Karis is waking... gotta go!